Tuesday, February 9, 2010

The Winter Olympic Drinking Games-Hockey

And we're back! After our weekend lay-off due to Snowbliteration, we are continuing our countdown of Winter Olympic Drinking Games. In preparation for the opening of the Olympic Winter Games in just 3 short days, we are bringing you an exclusive series of event-specific drinking games to enhance your viewing experience. We are publishing one drinking game per day from now until the Games begin. Today's sport: ice hockey. As described on the official Vancouver site, "The word hockey comes from the old French word 'hocquet,' meaning 'stick.' The British most likely brought the idea of using a stick to propel a snowball along the ice of a pond or lake to North America in the 1600 or 1700s. In 1879, college students at McGill University in Montreal organized competitions and developed the first known set of hockey rules."

Other than being an awesome spectator sport, an additional reason you should pay attention to the ice hockey competition is that it is one of the few Winter Olympic sports invented in North America- even if it was by those crazy French Canadians. Unfortunately, despite it's awesomeness, the hockey polls about evenly with soccer in terms of American fan interest. This may be largely due to the fact that while the USA routinely does well in international competitions, they rarely ever win. That honor is usually claimed by the Canadians or one of the powerhouse teams from Eastern Europe. What are we to do? That's right, do what we do with everything else: monetize every aspect of it, trademark and copyright its pants off, and claim it for our own. Hence, the premier hockey league in the world- the NHL- is based right here in the good ole' United States of America. So while all you dern foreigners may be collectively better than Americans at the sport, at the end of the day you're still getting paid in Green Backs. How ya like them apples?

Remember to always begin and end every drinking game with chants of "USA! USA! USA!" People will hear you, they will understand, and they will join you. And, of course, the game described in last Monday's post applies throughout the entirety of the Olympics.

The Ice Hockey Drinking Game:

1.) Take a drink at the beginning and end of every period

2.) Take a drink every time the team you're rooting for wins a face-off

3.) For every goal scored take a drink for the following: for every player on the ice for the scoring team (maximum of 6); for each assist on the goal (maximum of 2); if the team you're rooting for scores shorthanded (the team has a penalty, and are thus down one or more players) drink double; alternatively, you can chug until the goal celebration is over and take a shot immediately afterward

4.) Take a drink if the goal is scored against the team you're rooting for (think of it as pouring one out for your homies)

5.) Take a drink for every penalty- 2 minute penalties get 2 seconds of chugging, 5 minute majors get 5 seconds, etc.; take a shot for every ejection

6.) Take a drink one for every body check that knocks someone down

7.) Take a shot for any injury requiring a stoppage of play

8.) Chug for the duration of every fight; finish your drink if the team you're rooting for wins

Bonus Shootout Rule:

9.) Take a drink for every goal the team you're rooting for scores; shotgun a beer if they win in the shootout

The full ice hockey schedule: http://www.vancouver2010.com/olympic-hockey-schedule-results/

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